While the start of school can be a crazy time for almost anyone, by October many of us are settling into routines. This makes it a natural time to reflect on what seems to be working and what can use a little attention. Here are three simple starter questions to ask your child.
What seems important to you at school? The longer I teach, the more interested I get in why kids think they’re doing what they’re doing. This shows you where their attention is going, and it can also help predict what they’re going to retain down the road. Also, listen for “Why do I have to…?” questions. It may not be simply whining about homework. It may be an opportunity to help your student make a connection that makes their day-to-day work more meaningful. Any time you spend here shows your student how their education matters to you.
What’s challenging to you at school? Challenges offer us chances to grow, and how we choose to think about and handle them trains us to handle challenges in the future. Listen and ask to understand, not to solve for them. Wherever you can, express confidence in their developing capabilities and in how they are choosing to approach their own challenges. Offer to pray with and for them, then check back a few days or weeks later to see how things are going. No matter what the challenge is, this is a place worth spending time.
Where do you see yourself growing? Over time, education done well should lead to change. Listen for little stories about this. What seemed difficult at first but is starting to seem a bit easier now? What seemed pointless or boring at first but is starting to seem more interesting? What did you learn in the past that you are grateful for now?
Proverbs 13:12 reminds us that a hope deferred makes the heart sick. We can think of hope as a thread connecting the present with the future. Sometimes kids lose hope because they cannot see themselves making progress. They have trouble seeing a connection between their work and results. Older kids sometimes lose hope because they cannot see why their progress matters, or how it’s going to help them in the future. In either case, an open-ended question can help start an important conversation.
A classroom veteran, George Rietz encourages teachers, teaches homeschoolers, and invents new tools to reshape education. Contact him through ExploreMyWriting.com.
